So as many of you know, these last couple of years have been life-changing for me. Just over two years ago I made the decision to accept Christ into my heart. It wasn't an easy decision for me. In fact, it was preceded by a very difficult internal battle between my brain and my heart. My heart wanted it so bad but my brain just would not let go. I remember it felt like a locked door that I just needed the key to unlock, I would pray and pray for that key. Finally God put me in the right place the right time and completely changed my life. Door unlocked.
In my short 25 years here on this Earth, I've experienced some exceptional highs and lows. Some of the lows where really low, but for some reason I got through it. I look back now and see this beautiful ribbon that is God's work threading my life together piece by piece. Sure, some things could have been easier but then again some things could have been much harder. Ultimately, everything happened in exactly the right way to make me me.
Shortly after finding the Lord, my life began to blossom. Instant proof that caused me to feel such anger towards myself for being so bull headed, so stubborn, so ridiculously childish for so long. I could have made things so much easier on myself. But then again, I would have missed out on such a profound realization if I had. It's funny how the Lord knows you better than you know yourself. He knew exactly the right way to grab me. He knew he had to break me down to a certain point before I would even be willing to listen. He knew that I could not just blindly believe, that I had to educate myself in His word and he put exactly the right person into my life to guide me through that. He also knew that He had to wait until just after I submitted to him to show His glory in my life, causing me to cripple beneath the weight of His love. I had to be broken in order to be put back together the way that He wanted me.
Month after month Wes and I began to see blessings in our life. Blessings left and right. Unimaginable blessings.
I often times laugh at that person that I used to be. What a silly little person I was. The Lord has done beautiful work in my life and I am so enjoying seeing it take shape into the life he has chosen for me. There is so much that is still unknown and I look forward to the path He has chosen for this family.