Sunday, August 26, 2012


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Sofia said "Knox" today. 
Well, it sounded more like "Nots," but that's fine by me. 

Sofia knew I was pregnant before I even knew I was pregnant. 
Do you remember me talking about shopping in Walmart (yes, this happens about once a year) and how she leaned forward from the cart and hugged my tummy? She suddenly started doing this and just plain loving on my tummy and when I found out I was pregnant it all made sense.
Well, she hasn't stopped. Only the "loving" has turned into hugs and kisses and laying her sweet head on my belly and even pulling up my shirt and rubbing my belly tenderly while giving it another sweet kiss.

It's amazing how they know. 

So we first started referring to the new addition as the "baby" and Sofia instantly took to that word. "Baby, baby, baby" along with her referencing my tummy, which went on for months. 
Then we found out it was a boy and also that he had a heart problem and when your baby has a problem you have to name him, you don't want to just refer to him as the "baby" anymore. You want to call him by his name, pray for him by name, tell him it's going to be okay by name. 
So we decided on Knox and Knox it is. 

So now, we have been referring to him as "brother" and "Knox" rather than "baby."
Sofia knows that "baby", "brother" and "Knox" all mean the wiggle worm that is inside mommy's belly. 

But today she said "Nots" in reference to my belly. She said it a couple of times, while pulling up my shirt and pointing to my belly and then giving it her little signature pat and kiss. 

It is amazing how they know. 
It is even more amazing how they know it is something to love and to kiss and to hug. 
She is only 16 months old and she understand there is a baby in my belly and that his name is Knox and that she is supposed to love him and be sweet to him. 

God really is GOOD. 


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Monday, August 20, 2012

August in Pictures

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Well summer is almost over AGAIN. 
The fair has come and gone. 
All of the kids are going back to school. 
And that signature Southern California August heat is hitting us hard. It's been anywhere from 75-85 degrees in Ventura the last couple weeks and as hot as 115 in the valleys and deserts.
Wes has been cookin' at work up on top of that machine out in the sun.

I absolutely hate being pregnant in the heat. This sweaty exhaustion makes me really miss my sweet little winter pregnancy that I had with Miss Sofia. Man that was slick. This is tough stuff right here. Not to mention, I'm lugging around a 30 lb. toddler and a diaper bag that probably weighs another 20 lbs. Phew. Talk about a work out.
It's keeping me thin and fit though, I'm doing much better this time around. I barely weigh 155 right now at 5 and half months pregnant.... I weighed 155 when I got pregnant with Sofia. LOL. So hopefully I won't gain 50 lbs this time around HA. 

I went down to Chino Hills to celebrate my dear friend Cherisse's new little baby on the way!
It's hard to believe that we have been friends for 13 years and I am so excited that we are going to have little boys the same age!! How fun!!  
I was super excited that I finished Cherisse's crib bedding in time for her shower and was able to watch her open it!
Here is the final product, perfection! 
 While I was busy with Cherisse's shower, Wes took Sofia on a daddy date to the Ventura County Fair with Uncle Nate and Auntie Moo. 
Sofia has now been to the fair 2 years in a row now, it's hard to believe she's even been around that long! 

Summer is Wes's busy season, so when he gets time to be home we try to spend special time together as a family, lately we have been enjoying walking the harbor and showing Sofia the boats or "bows" as she says :o). She likes to sit and watch the boats driving around the harbor almost like you would watch a TV, it's precious. 
Dad took her on the Merry-Go-Round for the first time. She wasn't sure that she liked it at first, but she warmed up pretty fast. 
A couple of friends told me how I can start turning my blog into books, so I ordered by first two years of blogging..... our very own family year books! 
 My pregnant mind is going nuts lately, trying to sort everything out and plan 10 million steps ahead, but of course nothing works out that way and the Lord is once again teaching me patience and trust, so in order to slow my gears and strengthen my faith, I have been reading a devotional at night when my wheels are spinning out of control. It has really helped me to focus on what is important, the here & now, trusting the Lord and remembering to always put Him first, others second and myself last (which I think is even harder when you are pregnant because you don't want to do much of anything period).
It has really been a blessing. 

I met today with my bible study group to talk about what we are going to study this fall and I have to say I am so looking forward to starting up again. I always miss it when we take breaks (for Christmas or summer) and I am super stoked to get back on track and get back in the word. 

I was thinking today that this time next year Sofia will be starting pre-school, I just can't even believe how fast time is flying. We have about 4 months left until we get to meet Knox and I'm pretty sure I just found out I was pregnant. 

Advice to my children: live every moment like it is your last because before you know it you will be 25 and married with beautiful children of your own, terrified that you are going to simply blink and wake up at 50 and then 70 and then 80 and this beautiful adventure will be winding to an end and you won't get to hug that precious little body or kiss that gooey little face anymore.
Oh yah, and if you ever are trying to decide whether or not you should take a shower, always take the shower.



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Thursday, August 9, 2012

How He Healed a Broken Heart

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Some of you already know, many of you don't. 
We chose to keep it to ourselves, perhaps out of hope, perhaps in order to avoid acknowledging it, perhaps because we just didn't want to talk about it. 

Two weeks ago we found out that our precious little baby was a boy, a wish come true. Within five minutes of finding out he was a boy, we got news that overshadowed our excitement in its entirety. Knox was diagnosed with Subaortic Ventricular Septal Defect (VSD). What this means is that the wall between the two ventricles of his heart never fully closed, leaving a gap, or hole. At first look, the hole looked quite large and the placement was particularly negative. 

This is a defect that would affect his entire life. He would not be able to play sports, he would always be short of breath, he would have all of the typical symptoms that come with heart problems. His heart would always be working overtime. 

We were told that the hole could close up at any point between that ultrasound appointment and his birth, even shortly after birth. We were told not to worry until we were told to worry. We were told not to research it or "google" it for the time being. We were told that of the congenital (pre-birth) heart defects, this is the most common. We were told to see a pediatric cardiologist in two weeks for a fetal echo. 

So those two weeks crept slowly past. We went through every emotion in the book, from sadness and frustration, to fear and doubt. We settled upon trust. Emotions ran deep and with them came tears and deep prayer.  We came to the realization that we truly have no control over this little life growing inside of me and if this is what the Lord has chosen for our sweet baby boy then we can do nothing but trust in Him, that he has a perfect plan for us and our sweet Knox, that through Him anything is possible. So we let go of our human emotions and decided to trust and trust we did. We never stopped praying for Knox's health and for the healing of his heart, because that is what parents do. They trust the Lord, they never give up on their children, they never loose hope. So we prayed and we trusted. 

Eventually, slowly, the two weeks passed and I drove to Thousand Oaks with a friend (because Wes was on the road and couldn't get home) to meet with a pediatric cardiologist who works at UCLA and Cedars Sinai. 

We spent almost 2 hours in the appointment, looking at every angle of his heart. I got up, moved around, drank some juice, came back for a second round to try and get a better view. Another Dr. came in to look over his heart to confirm what the Cardiologist believed....

... that she is 99.9% positive that sweet Knox no longer has a hole in his heart. She said she would be 100% positive, except that he was being very difficult and making it hard for her to see his heart in exactly the way she wanted to. However, after almost two hours of looking it over time and again, she believes it is completely intact. 

So our beautiful Father healed our son's sweet little broken heart and made it whole again, in the same way that he healed my own heart and made it whole again. A vivid reminder that without him we are broken, fallible and utterly imperfect. A reminder that he can make anything happen and that we will find true comfort and love only in Him. A reminder that we should always trust Him, because He does indeed have a perfect plan that is beyond our understanding. A reminder that life is short and can be stolen from us at any moment, nothing is guaranteed and therefore we must live each day with hearts full of love. 

Thank you to those of you who prayed for Knox, for those of you who once again held me up when I forgot I could be strong. Thank you for loving this little family and for carrying us through.

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Tuesday, August 7, 2012

15/16 Month Update

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Well, our sweet girl is about 16 months old (in 2 days to be exact) and we just finally made it in to her pediatrician for her 15 month Well Baby exam. I know, I know. 

She is 32" long, putting her in the 83% for height. She weighs 29 lbs., putting her in the 99% for weight and her chrome dome is 18.5" in diameter, which actually has dropped her down to the 79% for skull size (praise the Lord, she has been off the charts in this category her entire life until now). 

She is a corn-fed little monster, that is for sure. 
And when I say corn-fed, I mean corn-fed. 

Sofia is blossoming. I was excited to say "YES" to every single one of the doctors "can she?" questions. 

She can: 
  • Wave hello/good-bye
  • Use a fork/spoon
  • Communicate clearly with words and/or sign language
  • Walk backwards (odd question, right?)
  • Obey commands
  • Say "Momma" and "Dadda" discriminately
  • React appropriately
  • .... and a bunch more questions my pregnant brain can't remember LOL
Sofia now says about 20 words, some of which are names (and she says those discriminately). She is also pulling random signs out that I tried to teach her at 6 months old and she seemed to never catch on to, but obviously her brain saved them away somewhere because 10 months later they are making their debut. 

Yesterday, she sat on something metal (which was super hot from the sun), jumped up and said "hot!". Her brain is constantly amazing me with all these new little developments. I am so in awe of this beautiful little person. 
Sofia's favorite things:
  • Swimming/Playing in the water
  • Drawing
  • Walking/Running
  • Pushing/Pulling
  • Eating (it's true) 
  • Sorting like-items
  • Dancing to music
 She sleeps from 7:30PM to 7:30AM and takes a 2 hour nap from 12:30/1 to 2:30/3PM. 
She eats breakfast, lunch, afternoon snack (smoothie with vitamins) and dinner and she really hasn't been picky at all.  She hasn't thrown tantrums in at least a month and has been very obedient and calm lately -- although she does have her moments as does anyone. She has 8 teeth and is currently cutting 4 molars at once, which seem to be stationary right now, giving her a little break in the pain.

And on top of all the growth and development, boy have we had a fun summer!

We found out we were adding to our gang of misfits!
 We woke up slowly to our favorite TV show.
 We played in the wood fire truck at Underwood Family Farms!
We wouldn't leave our belly button alone and it became so irritated that Mommy had to hide it from some very curious fingers! 
 We enjoyed our first popsicle on a hot summer day!
 We laid on the couch and recovered from a summer cold.
We snuggled with Brobee from Yo Gabba Gabba! 
We snuggled with sweet baby boy Sebek's nursery fabric. 
We loved on baby boy Sebek's crib quilt! 
 We made our first fort with Daddy!
 And woke up slowly underneath it!
We hung out with friends, Sofia and 'lil Nathan. 
 And more friends, Sofia and Wyatt.
 We enjoyed our very own camping chair. 
 We gobbled up soy & dairy free cupcakes.
 We sat in our chair with Mini and watched Yo Gabba Gabba.
We played in our matching wagons with Wyatt. 
We went to a fun Calavo growers BBQ up in Ojai. 
And spent time with Uncle Nate and a very strange pink monkey balloon hat.
 We played at a park in Thousand Oaks.
And down at Surfer's Point. 
 We slurped up yummy vitamin filled fruit smoothies.
 And fed the ducks in Thousand Oaks.
 We randomly fell asleep on Mommy's lap.
For the first time in at least 10 months. 
 We discovered ribbon.
And made it fashionable to wear. 
We discovered Hot Wheels and started a collection
And enjoyed dinner at our very own table with a friend. 
 We fell asleep in the truck.
And enjoyed delicious dairy & soy free pizza with Goia dairy/soy free cheese! 
 And gobbled down some grapes.
We slept on the way out to Bakersfield to visit the Hester's. 
 We visited a fun park in Bakersfield with a stream and lots of pollywogs.
 We loved on our new upcoming addition.
 We played in the stream.
We got a fun new ID bracelet listing our allergies. 
 We found out we are having a little brother! 
We helped Mommy pick out some clothes for our new little brother, Knox.  
 We borrowed Daddy's glasses.
 We tested out Uncle Clark's dirt bike.
We played with Daddy at Rainbow Bridge Park. 
 Daddy gave us a few pointers on shootin' hoops.
And on how to go down twisty slides. 
We tested out some new toys. 
 And we learned how to drive like Fred Flinstone.

Well, it's been one heck of a summer so far and it's not even over yet! It sure has been hot lately though so I have a feeling there is lots of water play in the future for us!
Happy summer!

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