Monday, December 30, 2013

Letter to my Children: Part 3

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Where were we?
We're towards the end of summer now and I think we were feeling finally settled (or some version of that) at our new home. We had decided to close our eyes and follow God's prompting by leaping into business ownership. Your father was awakening from his depression and talking a lot about God and God's plan. A lot was on the verge of changing.

We decided that your dad would quit his job at the end of August and would work for the Plum's all of September. He had already been training on weekends all summer, but this would be our first leap into the unknown. Dad would get paid less than half of what we were used to living on for the month, in fact it was just shy of covering our rent. We still had our normal living expenses, on top of medical bills and student loans to pay. So, it was a matter of trusting the Lord to provide for us. Fortunately, we are not strangers to surviving on a dime. So we began pinching penny's, shopping for vegetables at the swap meet and buying our groceries from the 99 Cent Store, we began making minimum payments on our medical bills and cutting back on driving to save on gas. We began saving in every way we could and you know what kids, money just sort of appeared. Not only were we able to reallocate funds by saving where we normally would have spent, but we were also blessed beyond words to receive help from the most unexpected and loving sources. God has a way of making things happen when they don't seem possible.

Sofia, this week, we have been memorizing Mathew 19:26. "With God, all things are possible." I'm sure that you have no idea of what this means right now (although you sure have a lot of fun shouting it out, you are so smart and so good at memorizing). Sweet children, it is true. With God, all things are really possible. If God has a plan for you and you listen, He WILL make it possible. It is beyond words and beyond my understanding.

Sofia, back in April we signed you up for preschool. Now it was the end of August and it was time for you to actually go. I almost backpedaled a couple of times. It was hard for me to see you go. This probably sounds silly, it was only three days a week and only three hours a day, but someday you will understand what I mean. It was a small taste of having to let a little bit of you go.

About a week before school was to start I decided to potty train you. Call me crazy. This was either really crazy or really smart, either way we did it and you did well. You had accidents here and there but here we are 4 months later and you are great at it! You go the whole night as well as naps. Potty training is a hard process. It's not easy, but we committed to it and I am so proud of how well you have done. There are lots of experiences in life that will make you feel like you are traveling rocky road and you should just give up or turn back, but I've found that most of the time you just need to stick it out. With children it seems like a lot of parenting is about consistency and commitment. You will second guess yourself a lot, but stay true. Most people give up right before they see the results of their hard work. A lot of time things get the hardest right at the very end. It often get's worse before it gets better.

You took to school like a moth to a flame. You love school and the teachers always have good things to say. They tell me how you sing loud and you listen well. You have made so many friends and you talk about them all of the time. You really have blossomed into a little person, with so many words it sometimes blows my mind. I'm just sure that you were just a sweet babe swaddled in my arms. Time goes fast once you have children, don't take any moment for granted.

I would realize later that these couple of months at the end of summer were the eye of the storm. 

October came fast and furious and before we knew it we owned a business. We were filled with excitement but our fear was in full force. We had nothing to cling to but God, He was in fact our only safety net at this point. I was completely and utterly overwhelmed. Here I was trying to be a mom to a toddler AND an infant, trying to run a business, take 20 + phone calls a day, take care of my hair clients, keep our house clean and on and on. The funny thing is these are all things that I am really good at separately, but add them together and they can become emotionally lethal. I began to learn a lot about my limitations and how truly real those limitations are. I began to have emotional breakdowns and everything was getting done only part of the way. By the end of October, I would have done anything for a break. We felt so blessed for God leading us to this business and in fact it was the perfect fit for us, we loved everything about it and Dad was in his element; but I was drowning and gasping for air. I kept thinking, I just need a break, I just need a break, I just need time to think and plan, I need a break.

And that is what God did. He hit the breaks.

Knox, you got sick and Mom and Dad had no idea the turn our life was about to take. be continued. 

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Sunday, December 29, 2013

Letter to My Children: Part 2

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So lets rewind just a bit. Remember when I said we fought colds most of the spring? Well, Knox, you ended up in the ER with croup at the end of March. Fortunately, they treated you and we were home that night and you recovered pretty quickly. Sofia, about a week later (and less than a week before your 2nd birthday) we were back in the ER for you with a broken wrist. You rolled off the couch and somehow landed on it just right. What are the chances. I had planned an entire Minnie Mouse birthday party for your second birthday and, well, you rocked your cast in an adorable Minnie Mouse dress, ears and all. You actually did really well with a cast on, even at just barely 2 years old. You have always been such a strong girl. In fact, there was a moment in our 6 hour wait at the ER where I almost walked out because I thought I had been over zealous in taking you in and there was not actually anything wrong (you were so calm) but then of course the x-rays came back and I was grateful I had stuck it out.

Around this time, as I was starting to feel emotionally healthier, your father was starting to fall into his own depression. His job was killing him. He was exhausted and overworked physically & mentally. His eyes were blood shot and he would literally come home and stare at the wall. He couldn't function. He was being worked to death and was being treated horribly at the same time. He was also struggling with some very emotionally taxing circumstances in his extended family and he was just sort of "all used up."  We both really struggled with our emotions at this point and I am sure we both felt very alone. We weren't communicating and I wasn't sure of what to do. In ten years, I had never seen your father like this. I couldn't seem to find a solution, nothing that I did worked, so I prayed. I prayed and I prayed.

Children, it is important to know that we all hit points like this in our lives. There will come a time when you see the light start to flicker in someone who has always been your shining lantern. We all hit rocky road sooner or later, where we don't think we can sink any lower, where we feel broken and it becomes difficult to function. You have to know, that in these moments, God is hard at work on you. We often spend much of our lives building ourselves the way that we want and at some point He comes in and says, "that's not exactly what I was thinking." He starts breaking pieces off and molding us this way and that until we start to take on a new shape, the shape that was His plan for us all along. Your dad was right in the thick of this. It's hard to see it while it's happening, that is why we must trust and have faith and know that there is always a plan bigger than us. When God calls you to get out of the boat, you stay strong in your faith and you keep your focus on Him because He is all that will get you through. You ignore the storm and the waves and the sea, you focus on Him and you get out of the boat.

Summer was nearing and you both were getting so much bigger and we were just at our wits end with our tiny condo. Not to mention, I was really struggling carrying 60+ pounds of wriggling children up those stairs all day long. Around this time, blessing after blessing, the pieces fell into place and we moved to our little cottage on Alameda. What a blessing this place has been to us. But here is the thing about moving with a 6 month old and a 26 month old, it is really hard. Really hard. There is no getting around it. You both were loosing your minds, crying and clinging and waking up at night, struggling to go down. That was a very overwhelming time for me. We were all out of sorts for a while. We got some good news around this time, news about a possible business opportunity. News that would mean a world of change for your father and I.  We were excited and terrified. We were in constant prayer for God to show us if this was His will for us and He kept making it clearer and clearer. So this is where Plum Lift-A-Door Co. came in to the picture. So much prayer later, we decided to close our eyes and jump. Again, with no idea of how we would do it or how we would get through, just that we felt God was making it clear that this was His plan. We were terrified.

I've noticed something about myself as a mother, I don't like the first six months. Don't get me wrong, there is nothing more special than a brand new baby that sleeps on your chest, a baby you get to breastfeed and bond with and fall in love with. But all in all, I am not a fan (minus the couple of things mentioned earlier). I LOVE when you hit the 6 month mark, I absolutely love 6 months and older. I've felt this way with both of you. You each hit 6 months and it was as if a whole new world opened up. I think this is because I love to see your personalities emerge, I love when you can laugh and play and interact. You start to become more human and I absolutely love it. I fall in love with you in a whole new way. So at this point, I was feeling better emotionally and we were settling in to our new home and I was getting excited about the possibilities for your father with Plum Lift-A-Door Co. I think he was getting excited too, his mood started to lift. He could see the light, there was an end in sight for what I often refer to as "Prudential's Reign of Terror" and suddenly I noticed something different about your father..... he sure was talking about God a lot more. He was praying a lot too. There was indeed work being done on that man. His heart had changed and I'm not sure if he even knew it.

To be continued.... 
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Thursday, December 26, 2013

Letter to My Children: Part 1

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I've had a lot on my mind lately. Mostly because this year has been so heavy for our family. Don't get me wrong, we have indeed seen blessings this year, very beautiful blessings and I am very aware of them. At the same time, we have seen a lot of heartache. A lot of trusting our great creator, knowing He has a plan that is greater than any plan our simple human minds could ever dream up. Praying for grace, for strength, for determination because it all can easily feel like too much and it many times has.

To my dear children,

I feel like I want to write this letter because we all need to know that we are not alone and I fear that someday you will have a year like the year we have just had and you will feel scared and lost and broken. You need to know that this is normal and that just like anything in life there are ups and downs. In the same way that the tide waxes and wanes, so will your life, your faith, your love, your determination, your strength and so on. These are the moments when we remind ourselves that in everything we need Him. He will sustain us, get us through, pick us up, push us kicking and screaming until we make it to the other end where we will look back and realize that there was no way we could have ever done that alone.

As you read through this book of blog posts from your childhood, you will realize how scarce this year has been. There weren't many posts, there were few moments to write and there were few moments where I felt inspired to write. Most of the time, when the inspiration came, my head was already on the pillow pleading for sleep and incapable of thought.

My sweet son Knox, you came into this world with a bang. You missed your first Christmas because you were in the NICU and you came home exactly a year ago today. That makes today a very special day for your parents. You have grown into quite the one year old. You are large and in charge, weighing in at just under 30 lbs. and off the charts for height, weight, head circumference. You are strong as an ox. You aren't quite walking yet, but that doesn't stop you from getting around almost as fast as your two and a half year old sister. You are funny and giggly and joyous. You are happy and content (unless of course you are hungry). You are a great sleeper, a great eater and just an absolute pleasure of a baby. Praise the Lord for blessings like these.

All of that aside, acclimating to a family of four was really hard. Unexpectedly hard. After much prayer, your father and I decided he wouldn't go back on the road this year. He couldn't bear the thought of leaving his family and I couldn't bear the thought of him leaving us. We felt like God was making it abundantly clear to us that he was supposed to stay in Ventura. So without any plan (besides the fact that we trusted the Lord and knew he would provide), your dad quit his job. We some how made it through, we stayed fed and we paid our rent. We had warm clothes and happy hearts. I couldn't tell you how, its just one of those things where God provided and there was always just enough.

Sofia, you sweet girl. You had such a hard time with me being in the hospital for almost a week, just as things started to get back to normal you came down with a horrible lung infection. You could barely move. You wouldn't eat or drink. You had a fever of 104 for days. Finally, with the help of antibiotics you came out of it. We watched so much Mickey Mouse Club House I thought I might loose my mind, but it kept you calm and happy so we kept watching it.

Sweet friends brought us food. Oh, did they bring us food. And groceries. And coffee. And prayer. We continued to fight terrible colds for most of the spring. The thing about having more than one child is that if one gets sick, you can pretty much plan on the others getting sick. We played "tag your it" with some pretty nasty colds for quite a while.

Around this time, I fell pretty deep into Postpartum Depression. I kept sinking lower, your father didn't understand how I could be so sad. I kept telling him, "I can write a list a mile long of all the reasons I have to be happy, I want to be happy and yet I am so deeply sad." This was a really difficult and rocky time for our marriage. He had just found a new job and it was paying the bills, but he was very unhappy. I was at home with no idea of how to juggle two children and all the while struggling with depression. Dad was working from 4AM to 8PM at times. We were dealing with the stress of situations with extended family members, having to make hard decisions and stand up for what we believed in, all the while trying to hold our own family together. We were living in a tiny condo, your father was sleeping on the couch because Knox was in the room with me and dad had to get up at 4am to go to work. Knox, you were not even close to sleeping through the night.... not even close buddy. Add sleep deprivation to the basket.

Finally, after many tears, a lot of fighting and a lot of inner turmoil (and with the help of a close friends and mentors) I made my way back into counseling. I would not say that counseling "fixed" the problem. This isn't the first time I've battled depression, but it was the first time I battled postpartum depression. I don't think that postpartum is something that can be worked through the way that regular depression can. At least it wasn't the same for me. I think that postpartum is 100% hormonal and I think that is the hardest part. You are at the whim of your hormones. However, having someone to talk to once a week (that wasn't in my inner circle) did work wonders for me. I could go and let all of my emotions out, cry and rant and dwell, and then I could leave it in that room for the most part. Slowly, after a couple of months,  I started to feel better and I started to see the light at the end of the dark tunnel. Praise God for that light, because when your depressed even a pin-prick of light seems like armfuls of joy. It gives you an anchor in the depths, a rope to cling to until your find the strength to start climbing again.

To be continued.....

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Thursday, December 5, 2013

Homeward Bound

Pin It Were going home. After 8 long days. Please pray he continues to improve! I don't have much to say right now. I'm exhausted beyond belief and emotional and ready for this all to be a memory. I've learned so much. God has changed me with this experience and changed so much of how I see this gift that is my life, these children, our friendships and our love. 

All that for another time. 
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Wednesday, December 4, 2013

So It Goes

Pin It Well, most of you know we got airlifted (level 3 - which mean there is a doctor on board) to Childrens Hospital Los Angeles. Knox was not improving and VCMC was at a point where the tests needed were beyond their comfort level with an infant. They weren't making any headway. We've been here at CHLA since Sunday.

This hospital is lovely. Everyone here is amazing and if you can believe it, it doesn't really feel like a hospital. I have my own bed and my own section of the room that can be closed off from Knox so we both can attempt at sleeping. 

We've run multiple tests, we had a scare involving a mass in front of his trachea that showed up on an X-ray. However, a CT scan showed that it was just swelling, but what a long scary day full of tears waiting for that news. 

We've seen an Ear, Nose & Throat Specialist who looked down his throat with a camera and saw nothing but inflammation & swelling. 

The team has come to the conclusion that this is just a very severe case of croup. So at this point we have to wait for Knoxs body to fight the virus. He has been on steroids to keep the swelling in his neck down, allowing him to breathe. As we've realized at this point, he seems to regress 24 hours after the steroid injection... hence our 2 additional trips back to the ER last week. 

So now that the conclusion is croup, Knox will be taken off of steroids and have to go 36 hours without medical intervention. If he does well, we go home. If he needs another dose of steroids, the clock starts over. 

Please keep praying, this has been such a long road with many scares, ups and downs and all arounds. Our family wants so desperately to be reunited, for our boy to be healthy. I miss Sofia more than life, my heart is breaking into a million pieces to be away from her. 

I feel so grateful for all of the people that have reached out to our family, who have prayed with us and for us. Who continue to pray because we are not home yet, we're not out of the woods yet. 

We are so grateful for your love in this time of uncertainty as we wait for our sons body to beat this and as we pray to a great God that we know will get us through. 
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Monday, December 2, 2013

Little Breathes

Pin It It's sad that I've chosen a time such as now to start blogging again, but time is what I have right now so now should be as good a time as any. 

I'm sitting in our room in Peds at County Hospital. It's a tiny room on the sunny side of the hospital. This seems like it would be a good thing, sunny is cheerful, but really dark would be better because what we need is sleep.

We've been in the hospital for 6 days now... Rushed into the ER in an ambulance from our pediatricians office, admitted and then released on Thanksgiving. Back in the ER the next day, released. Back in the ER the next day, admitted and here we are on day #2 of our 2nd hospital stay this week. 

My heart is aching to be away from Sofia, my heart is aching because we don't know what is wrong with Knox. We know that he has all the symptoms of croup, that he is struggeling to breathe, but we also know that it would be very rare for croup to last this long. 

We're searching for explanations, undergoing testing, talking to doctor after doctor, seeking answers and praying. Oh Lord are we praying. Theories are being tossed out left and right: could it be that he has scar tissue from being intubated in the NICU, could he have an oddly shaped esophagus, could he have a vascular tether on his esophagus, is his heart pushing against the wall of his throat.... On and on. 

All the while, Knox is showing no signs of improvement, but praise the Lord he is also not getting worse. He's just kind of staying the same. 

We see an Ear, Nose & Throat specialist this afternoon and our next move will depend entirely on what comes of this meeting. 

Prayer. Please pray. 

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Friday, September 20, 2013

Box Tops for Education

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Message to Friends & Family:

Sofia's school is collecting Box Tops for Education. Theses can be found on hundreds of products, most large brand food items as well as most Hanes brand clothing. If you happen to buy anything with a Box Top for Education on it, please clip it and pass it our way to help support Sofia's classroom. Each Box Top equals money for classroom supplies for these sweet babies to learn & grow!

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Thursday, September 19, 2013

One of Those Days

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Today is one of those days. 
You know. 
The kind of day that just starts out hard and keeps on truckin' in the wrong direction. 
You forget about days like this, until they sneak up on you and bite you in the behind. 
Days like today are the kind of days where you need lots of encouragement, some big hugs and a big 'ol latte in your hand. 

Lets face it, every mom has a day (or multiple days) like this. Things happen. People affect you unintentionally. The kids are fussy for some unknown reason, falling and scraping themselves and then crying and clinging on for dear life, wanting more of you, the dishes are piling up, you can see the dirt on the floor, the laundry is thrown on the couch (at least its clean, that's something to be proud of), you have a list a mile long and on and on it goes. This is the life of a mom. 
The thing is, some days you are equipped to handle it and some days you aren't. 

Today, I may not be so well equipped. I remind myself that it is all in how I look at it (I just had this conversation with a client yesterday, how funny) that God will sustain me and I pray, I pray that the Lord will give me a happy heart, a loving heart, a determined heart. 

Suddenly, the kids go down for their naps and I close my eyes and collect my thoughts, I take in the silence and I focus. I rearrange my thoughts and I move into action. I change my frame of mind. This is where someone always says "easier said than done." But I don't believe that to be true. I believe you just do it, you do it until if feels normal. Someone said once that you don't fake it until you make it, you fake it until you become it. So get up, wash the dishes, sweep the floor, fold the laundry until suddenly the house feels better and you start to feel the motivation rise up inside of you and your mind starts to lighten and loosen and balance is restored..... at least until naps are over. :o) 

The life of a mom. 
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Sunday, September 15, 2013

A Year Unfolds

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Have you ever had a year that just seemed like complete chaos? I feel like that is this year. 2013. It has been complete and utter chaos and the chaos hit from many different directions. It was one of those years where you see lots of dots but no lines.... and then suddenly you get to a point where you start to see the lines connecting the dots. You start to see this grand experience that God tailor made just for you, to stretch you and grow you to get you to the point He needed you to be at. He has truly stretched us this year. We have dealt with chaos in our own small family as we fought through another difficult birth experience and then struggled to transition into a family of four amidst illness and sleep deprivation and unemployment, to acclimate to Wes being home, to find our new normal, we fought through Prudential's reign of hell and through emotional turmoil caused by close family members. We fought for what we believed in even though it caused us to lose people we loved dearly. We cried and confided and fought for friendships that seemed lost. We moved and embarked on a journey into business ownership that terrified us and excited us. We closed our eyes and trusted God despite how much it scared us. Here we are, three months before the end of the year and we are just now starting to see the dots connecting.... some of them make sense, some still don't and may not for many years. Yet I've watched my husband's love for the Lord grow and explode and change him and us in so many ways. I've watched him lean on the Lord in ways I never thought he would. I've heard his prayers go from simple and to the point to elaborate and eloquent. I've seen him excited to go to church and excited to lead our family spiritually for the first time in the length of our relationship. I think that for that alone, this tumultuous year was well worth it. 
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Wednesday, September 4, 2013

Cats Outa The Bag

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 There have been a lot of secrets around here lately. 
As many of you who know me well or follow this blog know, we have been in deep prayer over Wes's career and work situation for a long while now. We have made sacrifices of distance and time. We have tried different industries and professions. Nothing seemed to be a fit for our family and there were moments where I felt completely unsure of our future. We've prayed for God to lay His will on Wes's heart and mind, for Him to make our path clear. I'm realizing now that when God has a plan for you, he sometimes doesn't just make it clear, he makes it crystal clear. 

About four months ago he laid an amazing opportunity in front of us. An opportunity that seemed tailor made to our specific situation and after four months of deep prayer, of watching Him build bridges and carve out tunnels to clear our path, we are finally ready to announce that we are buying a business! 

We have been given the most amazing, honest, good-hearted, God-loving people as our mentors and we are having so much fun getting to know them better and getting to learn from them.

Did I ever, in a million years, think that someday we would own a garage door company? No, probably not,  but God's plan is so much greater than our own. We are so excited to announce that as of October 1st, 2013, we will be the new owners of Plum Lift A Door, a garage door installation and repair company that has been around since 1969!

Wes quit his job a little less than two weeks ago and is now training full time with the Plum family out in the field while I train in the "office" (my computer hutch in my bedroom).

We are so excited to see what God's plan is for us and hope that you will come along side of us on this journey as we take our next steps!

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Wednesday, August 14, 2013

Potty Training Continued

Pin It I'd say we're about 50% there. We've stretched the timer to every 20 minutes and 99% of the time she makes it. She pees in the toilet more than she doesn't. We've only had 2 accidents today and it's almost 4pm. We even took a short trip to Target with zero accidents. The girls doing pretty good. The part where we have yet to see major improvement is the area of verbalizing her need to use the restroom. I'm still not quite sure she recognizes the sensation of needing to pee. I find myself asking her constantly if she needs to use the restroom. I feel like she's getting it more than not though, I think tomorrow will be more clear.  Pin It

Tuesday, August 13, 2013

Culmination of Events

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I'm suddenly feeling exhausted. We had a long day yesterday, between my 5:45A wake-up call to a miserable, teething infant, our previously scheduled 2 year & 6 month photo shoot (yes, my son is almost 8 months, at least I'm getting it done), a complete lack of nap taking, a hair appointment and a toddler who suddenly, out of the blue, vomited all over me. Yep. Just like in the movies. On top of all of this, I had some very important phone calls that needed to be made (accomplished one, three to go), a house that needed to be cleaned, dinner that needed to be made and laundry that needed to be done desperately. Oi. I juggled the teething infant, the photo shoot, the hair client and the vomiting, but the buck stopped there. No cleaning. No dinner. No laundry. Praise God for a husband who doesn't care and who is willing to pick up food at a moments notice. 

Today I decided to potty train. Why? Because it's long overdue. Because Sofia is starting preschool on Monday and I feel like if it doesn't get done this week then it won't get done until Fall break. Because I had a couple of days with nothing on the calendar. I still haven't reached my verdict on whether this was smart or stupid. I'm exhausted, but besides that it has actually been a nice day. We haven't left the house and the kids have been really good all day, in fact they both went down easily for their naps at the same time (which is why I am even able to sit here and write, we've been struggling with this since we moved-- the reason you've heard very little from me). 

Potty training.... it's all over the board. First she tells me she has to go potty and we go to the toilet and she goes and it all seems very promising. Then I'll ask her repeatedly if she has to go and she will repeatedly tell me no and then stand clenching her legs while she pees all over the floor, mere seconds after she told me no. Pooping seems to be easier for her to understand. Peeing, who knows what she is thinking. It's only been half a day. We've had major success and major failure. We'll see what the second half brings. I feel committed, but at the same time, if she doesn't have it by the weekend I may just wait until Fall break. I'm going to kind of test the water with this one. 

Okay, off to make those phone calls. 

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Potty Training

Pin It WeIl it's time. It was time a while ago, but life was in the way. The timer is set for 15 minutes. The juice cup is filled to the brim. The candy is ready, the training underwear are on. We said good-bye to our diapers, "gave" them away to the baby in the family (brother) and took our first official poop in the toilet (and our first official pee on the bedroom floor). Here we go. 
By the way, we won't be leaving the house today or probably tomorrow so of anyone wants to bring me coffee I definitely won't complain! 
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Wednesday, July 24, 2013

Sweet Potatoes

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This is a long process, I started these slips in April. Yes. April. The last picture below is current time, I just took it. This is definitely not for the faint of heart. Two are about ready to pull & plant, the rest are just (crazy right?) starting. Holy guacamole. Anyways, I've managed to stay committed to these little guys for almost 4 months now. In fact, Ive named them... no I'm joking, that would make me crazy. I am, however, excited to get them in the ground!  

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Phoenix Song

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I'm slowly detaching myself from breastfeeding. It's a hard thing to do. Were at the 50/50 mark. I think by 8 months my cub will be completely off of breast milk.

It is bittersweet. I am exciting to care about myself again, to be interested in what I wear, in reading and writing and learning, in art and music and culture. In the things that I love.

 I'm thinking more. Not just desperate thoughts, but really productive thoughts. I'm wanting to write more. I love to write, I crave it in fact, like a drug.

So a journey begins. Into a new phase of life. Out of the cocoon of child bearing and infant coddling and into the world where I can be both Mom and Woman. 

I want to sit at a table and sip cappuccino, feel the crisp newspaper on my hands, the slight tackiness of the fresh ink on my fingers, feel the clicking clacking of the keys as I type, feel the cool breeze, the smell of the world around me. 

I'm ready to embrace my life and move forward. After seven months of feeling like a fish out of water, dealing with the ups and downs of depression, having forgotten who I am, I'm rediscovering myself, my passions, my motivation. I can feel God again. His presence, His energy.

It's time.
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Wednesday, July 17, 2013

String Bean Tee-Pee

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Thursday, July 11, 2013


Pin It Moving with two babies is complete madness. We are about 80% done.... I will post pictures when everything is complete. Lots of projects and organizing under way. Here are some pictures of the moving process (for your viewing pleasure). 

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Wednesday, July 10, 2013

Garden Update

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Pin It Well, my last post was over a month ago. This happens sometimes. Life gets in the way and when I'm in the weeds I have a way of "hunkering down" as a dear friend puts it. 

We have been juggling quite a bit over here, some that is blogworthy, some that isn't ready for the blogosphere quite yet and some that just doesn't need to be talked about. 

We have officially moved! It was long and hard and were not quite settled yet, but we did it! We did it with lots and lots of help from friends and family. We are so happy in our new house. There is plenty of space for us and lots of room for the kids to play and for us to invite friends and family over! It's such a good feeling to be able to invite people over again and host gatherings. 

Sofia is officially in her big girl bed 100% of the time with no problems and you should hear her speak! She is putting sentences together! Very crude sentences, but sentences!!! The other day she said "Uncle Nate took you. Took you see choo-choo train." Isn't that awesome?? My jaw just about dropped. 

Knox is growing like a weed. He hit 6 months in June, but is already in 12 month clothes! He sits up and feeds himself (eats like the man-cub that he is). 

The garden is exploding with growth & we are getting to enjoy some early crops. By next month I think we'll be drowning in veggies! 

I hope to blog more often, for a week or so I didn't even have my computer set up, but progress is being made and I am once again a legit member of the 21st century. 


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Saturday, June 8, 2013

First Clippings

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Parsley & Basil 
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Thursday, June 6, 2013


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I'm noticing how horrible the quality of these iPhone pictures are lately, darn! I've really been needing to get my dslr fixed.... actually doing it is becoming more of a need than a want which means I might actually get around to it, haha.

Wes had to do some work on the steering column in the jeep, so we headed out to the ranch to hang out while the men wrenched the afternoon away. 

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Tuesday, June 4, 2013


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Our little artist is making leaps & bounds. Notice how she is coloring specific objects now. Love it. 
Sofia - 26 months old
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Sunday, June 2, 2013

Garden Update

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Our garden is really coming along. It's amazing if you look back over previous posts, this little patch of land was flat dirt just two short months ago. I can't wait to see what it is going to look like in another month. The boys were working hard on putting my fence up yesterday, you can see part of the fence towards the back & right sides as well as the trenches for the rest of the fence which will go in next weekend. 

Right Side

Left Side 

Tomatoes, Basil & Bell Peppers

Cucumbers, Zucchini, Yellow Crook Neck Squash, Romaine, Cabbages, Parsley, Rosemary, Chives & Oregano

Romaine Lettuce

Our New Fence

Fairytale Pumpkins, Dwarf Pumpkins, Watermelon

Beets & Carrots (barely sprouting). 


Pole Beans & Sofia's Bean Teepee 

It's coming along! We have been having so much fun, we are spending so much time in the garden working together as a family. Sofia loves the dirt. She loves the chickens. I love that she is learning how to cultivate her own crops.... She helps plant seeds and dig holes and water. She's a regular little ranch hand. 

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